"Coping" is defined as being able to deal effectively with something difficult. There are few events in most peoples' lives that can demand our attention as much as a health crisis. That may mean a life-threatening event, a chronic illness or a combination of the two.

People who have a serious illness face many challenges. There are difficult emotions and preoccupations to handle such as anxiety, fear, and denial. Anxiety is nearly universal and anxiety can prevent you from receiving the best care. Some people may be paralyzed by concerns for their family and uncertainties for the future. 

Sometimes, recurrent questions occur that are unanswerable. People are scrambling to learn as much as possible which in and of itself can provoke and fuel anxiety and fear, and demand of the patient that he or she strain to cope even more. Perhaps one fourth or more of those with serious chronic illnesses like cancer will become depressed. Untreated, like anxiety, depression may not reverse even as the illness is being treated effectively. Depression can produce insomnia, changes in eating habits, intermittent agitation and worsening of some physical symptoms such as pain. These emotions can affect interactions with physicians, friends and family.

Take one step at a time. Accept help from others to get other tasks done. Have someone among friends and family with whom you can have confidential conversations. Some people choose to join a support group. If the emotional issues and questions persist, get professional help from a psychiatrist, psychologist, social worker or clergy person.